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Joke of the Day
"I hate two-faced people. It's so hard to decide which face to slap first."
Next Joke
"Why can't the train lady have a baby? Because she's miss carriaged.^(is it morbid?)"
"A pirate's wife asks him what body part he'd be most okay with losing The pirate thinks and replies, ""my spine!"" ""Why?"" says his wife, a little surprised ""Because it's holding me back!"""
"What is my favorite street sign? Slow children."
"I like my men like I like my grapes. Me:- I like my men like I like my grapes Friend:- Big and black? Me:- no, 16 at a time."
"What do you call a comatose Pope? esteemed vegetable."
"I wore a suit to Walmart and they made me their king."
"I was raised by my grandfather clock because my biological clock was never there."
"Why did the Star Wars movies come out in the sequence 4, 5, 6, 1, 2, 3? Because in charge of sequence, Yoda was."
"Mercurian day So - apparently one day on Mercury is an agonisingly long 1408 earth hours long... In other words - one Earth Monday."