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Joke of the Day
"They told me to keep it in my pants... But it was too hard. Happy Valentine's Day folks!"
Next Joke
"If 50 cent went broke what would he still have? lotta bills.."
"I wonder if my son's packed lunch tastes like the flavorless chore that it is."
"Walmart keeps two elderly people on staff at all times: one to greet you, and one to walk slowly in front of you on the way out."
"Things I use my car for, from most to least: 1)Tweeting while parked 2)Snacking 3)Transporting bugs that can fly but are lazy 4)Driving"
"Some people like to stir the pot... ...I prefer to smoke it."
"Computer Science major walks into an English class The Professor says ""Welcome to English 101"". The student panicks. ""What's wrong?"" asks the Professor. ""I missed the first 4 English classes""."
"What's the speed limit of sex? 68 Because at 69, you flip over and eat it."
"I hug people I hate so I know how big I need to dig the hole in my backyard."
"If the cat's got your tongue, it's your fault. What did you expect, making out with a cat?"