213667

Joke of the Day

"How many bassists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. Just have the keybord player do it with their left hand."

"What do you get when you cross a Zen Buddhist with a Jehovah's Witness? ...knock knock knock... excuse me sir, but do you have a few minutes to discuss nothing?"

"What happened to the Guns 'n Roses tour bus when it got a flat tire and had to be jacked up? Its axle rose."

"Why does Kylo Ren have a hard time making friends? Because for most of his life, he's Ben Solo."

"I don't need a drink in my hand to be happy. I'm also happy if the drink is on a table as long as it's still within arm's reach."

"How can you tell if someone lifts? Don't worry, they'll tell you."

"This lady at the store didn't know what a Toblerone was and I've honestly never been more offended in my life."

"""Opening a llama acting school called 'Save the Drama for your Llama."" ""No, I mean where do you see yourself in 5 years with this job?"""

"Many women say a guy who makes them laugh is all they want. They fail to mention all the things it takes to put them in the mood to laugh."

"Daddy, where do oranges come from? Well son, when a red and a yellow really love each other..."