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Joke of the Day

"A grasshopper walks into a bar and the bartender says ""hey! We have a drink named after you!"" And the grasshopper says ""You have a drink named Steve?!"""

"A Blanket? It would be a fukkit."

"So far it's been an, ""I look okay enough to go to Walmart but not to go to Target"" kind of day."

"I found a Squirtle in my pants & I'm not even playing Pokemon Go!"

"What is the first thing a fat person does on a website Accept cookies"

"Valve is like a deadbeat dad.... They both do well on creating, but suck at taking care of the offspring."

"What do comedians put outside their house on Halloween? 'Pun-kins'"

"What does a girl want more than anything in the world? Nothing. She's fine. Edit: Wow guys. Thanks so much for the upvotes, the hilarious comments and I finally got my 1st gold!"

"A man discovered a new medication that makes people sneeze constantly. What did he tell people in order to make them avoid taking it? Eschew! Eschew!"

"TIFU by spraying water on a topless model Now all the seats are wet"