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Joke of the Day

"GOD: did u eat from the tree of knowledge? ADAM: no...it was my girlfriend GOD: who? ADAM: u don't know her she goes to a different school"

"What happens when a carpenter drinks with his wife? He gets hammered and she gets nailed."

"If you heat your solid state drive into a gaseous state drive, do you get cloud storage?"

"The wife My wife has left me because she says I treat her like one of my pets... She'll be back when she's hungry."

"I've never actually finished the song ""Rock Your Body"" by Justin Timberlake because I'm afraid I'll be naked by the end."

"What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? One less drunk guy."

"I wish I was as skinny as I was the first time I thought I was fat."

"My phone reception is so clear, I can hear my wife's eyes rolling as I talk."

"What do you call an Asian woman with a white boyfriend? A sex slave."

"Job hunting tip: Leave the facial piercings at home. Hard to get hired when you look like you fell down a flight of stairs with a tackle box"