199213

Joke of the Day

"Rescue attempts are being made to save a bull stranded on Mt. Everest Reports confirm that the steaks have never been higher."

"toddlers and tiaras more like PROSTITODDLERS AYYYYYY"

"I always wanted to be a plumber when I grew up but in the end it was just a pipe dream."

"""Sorry I'm late! Was pointlessly checking the same 6 websites over & over again & lost track of time!"" - Honest Aziz Explaining Tardiness"

"A wizard and a vampire walk in to a bar The Wizard says, ""Let me buy you a drink old friend,"" The Vampire says, ""One chicken please!"""

"Why is the beef in Colorado so good? Because the steaks are high."

"When anyone ask me to babysit, I ask if their kid is a ""mean drunk"" or a ""happy drunk."" Gets me out of it every time."

"The other day I heard that photons have mass Who would have thought that they we catholic?"

"A man is caught staring so hard at his marriage certificate by his wife... She asks him what he's looking for. He replies, ""oh just the expiration date!"""

"Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because they weren't born yesterday."