182846

Joke of the Day

"How many NYPD officers does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They just beat the room for being black."

"Some of the weirdest looking Jehovah's Witnesses kept knocking on my door last night."

"Know why Jedi don't get married? Because they know divorce will be with them. Always."

"The week has seven days: Monday, Monday, Monday, Monday, Friday, Saturday and preMonday."

"It was my first time getting laid 5 minutes ago I'm hoping to hatch soon."

"A gun is like a coupon that works anywhere"

"If your joints pop, snap, and crack when you move your not old... Your just crispy. "

"your Lonely Score is the maximum number of forks a takeout place has given you for your single person food order. my score is 4"

"[office] BUSINESS SNAKE: [dictating a letter] SECRETARY: [just hammering the S key]"

"By putting the punchline in the title How do you trick /r/jokes into thinking it's a repost?"