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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear the one about the umbrella in the trench coat and sunglasses? He was looking shady."

"What's worse than missing your bus in the morning The Holocaust"

"The anchorwoman on the local news just reported that Davy Jones from the Monkees has died At first I didn't believe it. But then I saw her face."

"Wife: ""I look fat. Can you give me........ Wife: ""I look fat. Can you give me a compliment?"" Husband: ""You have perfect eyesight."""

"What is Brazil's favorite game right now? Hide and go zika"

"What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?"

"It was so funny that I forgot to laugh... Said the sarcastic man with dementia."

"I finally got tinder And after a few matches, I was able to start a campfire."

"DOCTOR: u broke ur leg in five places, how did this happen ME:*flashback of me trying to carry too much ice cream up the stairs* bears."

"What are two reasons it's so hard to solve a redneck murder? 1. The DNA all matches. 2. There are no dental records."