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Joke of the Day

"Hey baby, you're just like my little toe... ...because I'm going to bang you on every piece of furniture in my home."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Bjorn ! Bjorn who ? Bjorn with a silver spoon in his mouth !"

"I've decided to leave my past behind So if I owe you money, I'm sorry but I've moved on."

"We should just rename television viewing ""watching Geico commercials""."

"Calling someone 'one in a million' in China means they aren't that special."

"If you hate Capitalism so much, then just write everything in lower case. Problem solved."

"Remember back in the day when you'd call someone gay and it was an insult? Now a day, everybody is just so butthurt when you do..."

"Children are like STD's you try hard not to get once you get them your life is ruined, your stuck with them and their a huge pain in the ass"

"Why is the stick attached to the roof? Because it is sticky."

"*writing resume* Strengths? I'm great at multitasking *explosion in kitchen* My popcorn! *car crashes through fence* I forgot I was driving!"