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Joke of the Day
"Can a blind person please rub their hands over their dog's nipples and tell me what it says?"
Next Joke
"I think that the best Christmas present is the one that you make yourself you know? Like, crystal meth."
"Pants Coworker: ""Do you wear the same pair of pants every day?"" Me: ""No, I just have Fifty Shades of Grey."""
"I'm having a very hard time believing that money can't buy me happiness. Especially since I'm constantly smiling when I have it."
"What's the difference between your girlfriend on her period and a terrorist? You can negotiate with a terrorist."
"Why did Dr Facilier cross the road? He had friends on the other side."
"A fool proof way to never feel lonely. If you're ever feeling lonely, watch a horror movie. You won't feel alone anymore."
"Its and old, old joke... But some how it came to mind last night: ""Apart from that, Mrs. Lincoln, how was the play?"" (Tnx to Jeff Greenfield)"
"Q. Why is it good to have a blonde passenger? A. You can park in the handicap zone."
"What does PONTIAC stand for? Poor Old Nincompoop Thinks It's A Cadillac"