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Joke of the Day

"God must be a Republican. He wasn't that into humans until He found His Son was one."

"Kids are like squaring numbers If they're under 12 just do them in your head."

"What do they do to dead scientists? They barium."

"Psychologists say that the left half of the brain is responsible for both kleptomania and numeracy. It's the taking part that counts."

"Why does the Dalai Lama go to the bookies everyday? Because he likes Tibet."

"We should all be donating more to mental health charities It really is *fundamental*."

"A spokesman for Kelloggs says the company now fears the recent incident may be the work of a cereal offender."

"I can see 4 years into the future! You can say I have 2020 vision"

"So I was in math class when the teacher asked me what comes after 69. I said 70. I know you were expecting a joke, but I want to pass my exams."

"My orange tabby tried to convince me he was a big cat today I don't believe him since he's known for lion."