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Joke of the Day

"If i had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive They would eventually find me attractive"

"How about a month filled with stress and obligation? - Pitch for December"

"Went to the corner shop... Bought four corners."

"What is the Highest Proof of Tequila? Juan Fifty Juan"

"I'm seriously disappointed by /r/goldbenefits. Not even one name appeared in the Panama papers."

"*puts kid in tub* *checks twitter* *forgets about kid* *tweets* *remembers kid* *finds kid-shaped prune floating in tub*"

"A thousand millibar go into a bar... ..."

"What's a superheroes favorite narcotic? Heroine"

"My grandad always used to say to me that the best part of fighting is the make-up sex. Which would probably explain his short lived career as a boxer."

"Guy: Wanna go out? Girl: I have a boyfriend. Guy: It's just like soccer, just because theres a goalie doesnt mean you cant score."