122770

Joke of the Day

"A will is a dead giveaway."

"My teeth are so crooked they should run for office."

"Did you hear about the chameleon who couldn't change colour? He had a reptile dysfunction."

"What does it mean when you sit next to an elderly woman on the bus and she shakes her head and makes the sign of the cross?"

"OMG... JUST OPENED A CUPBOARD AND ALL MY POSTAGE STAMPS ARE PREGNA- Oh wait, it's Ravioli."

"Did you know that Helen Keller had a dollhouse? She didn't."

"The difference between your husband and your Netflix account is, over time, your Netflix account learns what you like."

"CUSTOMER: Can you make a pig cooler? WAITER: Sure spray him with a hose."

"Me: I can't live like this anymore, I need to start eating healthier. Also Me: I couldn't decide between nuggets or a burger so I got both."

"Ever look in a mirror wondering about the stranger staring back & then realize it's your neighbor's window and they're calling the cops?"