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Joke of the Day

"Two women in a shared cell were in the prison for 15yrs. When they were freed... ...they spent another 2hrs talking outside."

"Me: Do you ever feel like you're an imposter? Psychiatrist: Get out of my chair Me: Interesting *writes 'thinks he's the psychiatrist'*"

"I recently bought some Koi from Malaysia... That's one flight that made it."

"I came here for... ...funny jokes in the comments."

"A woman walked into a library and asked for a book on euphemisms. So the librarian took her up the rear aisle and let her have it."

"If Hillary brought a carpet bag to New York, what did Bill bring? Hard wood."

"What do some people have against cheeseburgers? They say 'Burgers can't be cheesy!'"

"At a Starbucks job interview ""What is your name?"" -Alyssa ""Could you spell that, please?"" -L A R I S S A ""When can you start?!"""

"What does an epileptic vegetarian eat? Seizure Salad"

"So psyched! My 1st granddaughter born today: 6lb11oz! Which is not the name I'd have chosen, but I guess I need to keep up with the times."