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Joke of the Day

"My neighbour tells me that he's poured a trail of spiced wine all the way from my house to his. But when I go outside to check... There isn't a punch line."

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"""If anyone knows a reason why these two should not marry, speak n-"" SHE ONCE COMMENTED 'FIRST' ON A YOUTUBE VIDEO *ring bearer vomits*"
"Seal walks into a club ..."
"Waking up this morning was an eye-opening experience."
"What does a 14 year-old Native American girl say when she loses her virginity? Stop Dad, you're crushing me smokes!"
"What do toys and boobs have in common? They were both originally made for kids, but dad ends up playing with them!"
"My Dad's Motto My dad always lived by the motto ""work hard, play hard."" Until mum made him seek help for his Viagra addiction."
"What do you call a bear that is not Jewish? Gentile Ben"
"The Venn diagram of ""stuff I was supposed to do today"" and ""stuff I did today"" is two separate circles and the second one is a pizza"
"""When you wish upon a star, it takes trillions of years for the wish to get there, and by that stage you're dead."" - Neil deGrasse Tyson."