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Joke of the Day

"Jenner is a hero, and quite frankly saved some lives Had I not replaced the Jenner in my truck last week I wouldnt have been able to shift into neutral when my accelerator stuck today."

"The date had been magic. We moved to her couch & kissed. That's when horror struck as my eyes locked on the Duck Dynasty DVDs on her shelf."

"Nothing is certain but death and iTunes updates."

"What is Red and Smells like Blue Paint? Red Paint"

"I'm drafting a plan to make more guy friends. So far all I have is ""Don't say ""super"" as often"" and ""Talk about beards."" I'm super jazzed."

"One sweet thing about being the boss in the office is that you can actually order specific supplies you want to steal."

"Just drank two 5-Hour Energy shots. Will I get 10 hours of energy? And why is that rainbow giggling at me? AndAHH MY SKIN IS ON INSIDE-OUT!"

"A travelling salesman gets into a self driving car. ""Oh shit"" says the car"

"I told my friend a joke about last night's Game of Thrones episode.. He agreed it was well done."

"How can you tell if a fat chick is pregnant? You can't."