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Joke of the Day
"If your nervous tick is pointing to the sky then might i suggest not going to auctions anymore."
Next Joke
"My girlfriend has terrible eyesight... she's always accidentally sleeping with other guys. Poor girl."
"To the handicapped guy who stole my bag: You can hide but you can't run."
"Just spent 3 hours making a belt out of all my old watches... ...it was a complete waste of time."
"A world without women... Would be such a pain in the ass."
"Can someone make a voodoo doll of me and send it off to the gym?"
"Wife: u can take Max to the park but ur not gonna wrestle other ppls dogs Me in a spandex singlet: Im 16-0 Karen I have a title to uphold"
"What do you call someone who pretends to work in a victorias secret? A panty-mime"
"What do you call a man with a fetish for US currency who works on a dairy farm? A quarter-pounder with cheese."
"Thieves had broken into my house and stolen everything except my soap. Filthy bastards."