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Joke of the Day

"My first time having sex was like my first time riding a bike .. my dad was holding me from behind .."

"I don't think I could date a deaf person... I couldn't take the silent treatment!"

"What did a blonde's mother tell her blonde daughter? If you're not in bed by midnight, come home."

"What kind of pants do you buy for your pet Chihuahua? Shorts!"

"Went to the doctors yesterday, suffering from premature ejaculation... ... doctor said, ""This must be very stressful for your wife"". I replied, ""To be honest, it's getting on her tits""."

"I don't care if you don't like space puns. I like space puns. Comet me bro."

"I just spent several seconds trying unsuccessfully to delete a comma. Turns out somebody sneezed it onto the computer screen."

"Why has barbie never gotten pregnant? Because Ken came in another box ;)"

"Working with underprivileged children is really rewarding because I get to tell people about it."

"God will never give you more than you can handle, unless you were born in the wrong place or don't have money. That makes God super mad."