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Joke of the Day

"A group of toddlers is called a migraine"

"What did the German policeman say to his nipples? You are under a vest!"

"LA has come up with a safe space, for people that voted for Trump And they're calling it Texas"

"What did the man at the gay bar say as another gentleman was leaving? Please allow me to push in your stool."

"Officer: Do you know why I pulled you over? Me: Because I'm riding a Big Wheel on the freeway? Officer: A STOLEN BIG WHEEL"

"How many McDonald's counter girls does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change it and one to put some chips with it."

"I remember how my uncle died.. Driving an 18 wheeler rig down a long, icy road in the pitch black with no working headlights. He swerved and suddenly BAM! Cancer."

"All rooms are panic rooms if there is no iPhone charger"

"A complete list of movie roles turned down by Nicolas Cage:"

"THE HORROR! *splat THE TRAGEDY! *splat IT'S AWFUL! *splat SO MUCH BLOOD! *splat WHY IS THIS HAPPENING?! *splat -It's raining men."