87313

Joke of the Day

"Michael J Fox and Taylor Swift dated, but broke up Don't worry, they're both going to shake, shake it off."

"If you come home after work and your wife greets you saying she got a massive pay raise from her boss at work, remember to not kiss her on the lips."

"What's the best drink for a dog? An old faschund."

"Are you ready for TheDivision's upcoming DLC? TheAddition? If not, you might like its already-existing-but-cut-for-later content TheSubstraction."

"There will be only 7 planets left After I destroy Uranus"

"The average Canadian couple says ""sorry"" 112 times in their wedding vows"

"Looks like my wife snuck a love note into my pocket which is pretty cute, although I don't know what ""DNR"" means."

"I should buy my girlfriend a plunger for christmas because she loves to bring up old shit."

"The year is 2030: All corporations have merged and every night before bed you say a prayer to your cable company."

"Behind every successful man stands a surprised woman and behind her stands the surprised mother-in-law and behind her,your surprised Dad."