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Joke of the Day

"How are Bill Cosby and Santa Claus similar They both only come when your sleeping"

"[Phone rings] Babysitter: Hello? Dude: Dont. Go. Upstairs. Babysitter: Wha.. What's upstairs? Dude: NOT MUCH, STAIRS, WHAT'S UP WITH YOU"

"If you ever get cold, just stand in a corner for a bit They're usually around 90 degrees"

"A month before my grandfather died we had tried everything to cure him. We then heard you could try covering him head to toe in baby oil - after that he went downhill very quickly."

"Why does Reddit love Ronda Rousey so much? she hits women"

"One time I called my teacher ""mom"" and she looked so confused and said ""I'm not your mom."" It made the rest of homeschooling really awkward."

"The only difference between a psychiatrist and a drug dealer is that the drug dealer doesn't make you wait an hour."

"I just whispered ""Come at me, bro"" to a bug and it ran towards me, so now I'm in my car driving away from my old life."

"I'm making a movie about a guy who thinks his girlfriend is cheating on him, so he secretly followers her around to keep an eye on her. It's called ""Bae Watch""."

"PMS jokes are not funny period."