82176
Joke of the Day
"In Soviet Russia... You are in charge of Charles. (h/t Wife)"
Next Joke
"You remind me of my big toe. Mainly, because I am going to bang you on every piece of furniture I own."
"what's the difference between oral and anal sex? Good oral can make your whole day, good anal makes your hole weak."
"I put my slacks on just like everyone else, from a waterslide into the loving yet frighteningly powerful arms of my pet minotaur Ferdinand"
"They named it Galaxy Note because when you take this thing out of your pocket, the entire Galaxy can note that it's been taken out."
"Girls are like puppies. If you don't take them out enough, they'll poop on your rug. SERIOUSLY ASHLEY ON MY RUG??"
"How come I need a complex, indecipherable password to get on Twitter but only a 4-digit number to remove all my money from an ATM?"
"A solar panel is talking to a wind turbine... The solar panel says, ""So what do you think about this whole renewable energy thing?"" The turbine replies, ""I'm a big fan."""
"There's a book about how the Roman Emperor Augustus was really buff and into weightlifting... It's called *The Guns of Augustus*"
"It's bad enough hearing people judge others based on their appearance... but when ugly people do it, I feel horrible."