79297

Joke of the Day

"The best time to reevaluate your life is when the online video you're watching is buffering"

"Marriage: I gave sex up for this?"

"What is a short punchy statement? Boxing Midgets."

"What did Pitbull ask for Christmas? Dolly."

"Why do some blondes have bruised belly buttons? Because there are blond guys too."

"I saw an alarming stat the other day. Apparently 25% of women are taking medication for some sort of mental illness . . . That means that 75% of women are walking around unmedicated!"

"The Kool-Aid Man seems depressed lately. Let's keep him away from load-bearing walls."

"Why should you never fight a dinosaur? You'll get jurasskicked!"

"*jumps out of plane* *begins reading parachute instruction manual* STEP 1: PUT ON PARACHUTE *looks up* Well hell"

"A man saw a jar at a store's check-out counter that read ""Donate $1 for children"". ""That's a good deal!"" he thought."