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Joke of the Day

"Him: Would you like to have lunch sometime? Me: I like to have lunch every afternoon."

"[phone rings] ""Mr Hughes?"" ""Yeah."" ""We need u to come pick yr son up from school."" ""Ugh. Whats he done now?"" ""Nothing. Its nearly midnight."""

"Chuck Norris actually died four years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him."

"Sometimes, late at night, I'll look up at the stars and wonder if you're also stealing lawn furniture."

"I'm a proud member of DAM: Mothers Against Dyslexia."

"What's the difference between an American student and an English student ? About 3000 miles !"

"What do fat white chicks and bricks have in common? They both get laid by Mexicans."

"What do you call a whistle-blower in a blizzard Edward Snowed-in"

"I'm not a racist Racism is a crime and crime is for black people."

"Why did Oscar Pistorius shoot his girlfriend in the bathroom? Because he's one of the few people in World that couldn't kick down the door."