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Joke of the Day

"FAA study of black boxes found in domestic US, fatal, small airplane crashes shows 98% say ""may day"" remaining 2% are pilots from Tennessee who say, ""hey good buddy, hold my beer and watch this"""

Next Joke
 
"Would you like to know how to read minds? It's simple! Just relax. Take a deep breath. Minds Minds Minds Minds Minds"
"Elephant 911: What's ur em- Elephant: MOUSE Elephant 911: WHERE Elephant: FLOOR Elephant 911: JUMP ON THE TABLE [table breaking noises]"
"Losing my virginity was a lot like riding a bike for the first time. My dad was holding me from behind."
"""you're too polite"" I am not [two weeks earlier while my house is being robbed] sorry he doesn't usually bark at strangers"
"Why do baby birds love Amy Schumer's comedy? They can't handle anything that hasn't been consumed and regurgitated."
"So, Apparently 'Human Centipede' Is Getting ANOTHER Sequel. 'Human Turducken'"
"A friend sent me a gif of LA traffic Took me about a day to realise it was a pic. (based on a submission on reddit some time ago) Also, this joke is shit, i get that."
"A group of midgets were planning to rob a butcher's... But the steaks were just too high."
"What do you call an acid with an attitude? A-mean-o acid."