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Joke of the Day

"I hate when people say 'I died laughing', and don't die."

Next Joke
 
"Today I broke my personal best record of most consecutive days alive."
"My dad has a great idea for Donald Trump's campaign slogan. ""Vote for me in 2016 or there'll be hell toupee."""
"Where do the bacteria gangsters hang out? On the Yeast Side."
"What do you get when you have sex with an STD infested mentally challenged person? The slow clap"
"I didn't text you just to exercise my fingers, I was expecting a reply back..."
"What do English class and a UFO have in common? Zeugma, tmesis, and polyptoton call it home!"
"Rick Ross on Valentines Day ""Shout out to all the pairs"""
"What's the buoyancy of an abortion? Rho * v * Wade"
"What do you call a coffee made with frothy milk that tastes like crap? A farte"