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Joke of the Day

"I wish the mailman would come to my house at the same time as the garbage man so he could give my mail directly to him."

"Keep saying yellow and soon enough It'll sound like you're saying gullible."

"My son walks in on me masturbating. He asks me what am i doing. I say, don't worry son you will be doing it soon. Why dad? he asks. Because my arm is getting tired"

"Geologists look for the same thing in rocks and girls Cleavage"

"It must get awkward when someone by accident makes one of those ""I let him get away with murder"" jokes around O.J Simpson."

"As a kid I wanted to be a tree surgeon... but the sight of sap makes me faint"

"And now for the most stupidest joke ever. How do you say the word ""peanuts"" *without* the letter ""t""? Think about it."

"What is the toughest religion to get into? The Difficult."

"""Any women in the audience who think I'm a male chauvinist, say ""Boooo!"" Every woman in the audience yelled ""Booo!"" The speaker said to the crowd, ""Obedient little bitches, aren't you?"""

"Professor, please tell us about discrete physical values in quantum mechanics. Sure, one moment."