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Joke of the Day

"An Irishman walks out of a pub. ..."

"How many dead hookers does it take to screw in a light bulb? I don't know, but it's not five, because my basement is still dark."

"Cleanliness is next to godliness in a dictionary missing some stuff."

"My neighbour is singing under the shower again. Luckily, i can't hear her through my binoculars."

"Why are black people so tall? Because their kneegrows"

"What do you call a herd of cows masturbating? Beef strokin' off"

"Lets share blonde jokes Howdo you drown a blonde? Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool"

"*angrily whispering over crib* ""Sheila you know I was raised by wolves. I have to pay it forward."" ""But why do they need their own cribs?"""

"A doctor reaches in his jacket for a pen.... and pulls out a thermometer. ""Oh great, some asshole's got my pen!"""

"I hate going to the dentist, he is always like ""did you eat Oreos before you came in?"" and ""you are still eating Oreos, I can see you"""