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Joke of the Day
"A vaping vegan walks into a bar Just kidding they're incapable of doing anything remotely cool."
Next Joke
"so a man answers a phone call... man - ""I don't know, I live about ten miles from the ocean"" wife - ""who was that? what did they want?"" man - ""some asshole who wanted to know if the coast was clear"""
"I wouldn't say I hate my dad... But I can't deny he's a real motherfucker."
"Knock Knock... Who's there? Sean Bean. Sean Bean who? Oh that's right, you started watching after his character died. Works for pretty much anything Sean Bean is in except Sharpe."
"What do old people smell like? Depends..."
"How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them."
"Why do they name all hurricanes after women? Because when they arrive they are wet and wild, and when they leave they take your house and car"
"What's the difference between a pick pocket and a peeping tom? One snatches watches..."
"My drug dealer sold me some shoes the other day... ...I dont know what he laced them with but Ive been tripping all day."
"The other day my daughter said, ""Mold is so gross."" I told her to ""respect its culture."""