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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the bear attack at that Chinese Zoo? It was Pandemonium."

"I think Congress should be forced to go on minimum wage. That way I can feel more comfortable calling them public servants!"

"What's a ghosts favorite ride at the carnival? The roller ghosted."

"Join The Army, visit exotic places, meet strange people, then kill them."

"ME: I need help losing weight. I've tried everything. NARRATOR: He hadn't tried anything at all. Nothing."

"A riddle or a joke? You are at a party with over 100 people, how can you tell which one is a pilot? He'll tell you."

"It's not Adam and Steve, it's Adam and [Cher autotune voice] beli-EVE *club goes crazy*"

"Doctor: ""I need to draw some blood."" Me: ""Okay."" Doctor: ""Do you have a red crayon I could borrow?"""

"When it's raining cats and dogs... Be careful not to step in the poodles!"

"My eHarmony Application was Rejected Apparently, ""My dick"" was not an acceptable answer to question #14: ""What do you like most in a woman?"""