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Joke of the Day
"How many Scots didn't turn up to vote? One in Fife"
Next Joke
"A wife was dying. She called her husband and said, ""Gary, I've been unfaithful."" Gary answered, ""I know. That's why I poisoned you."""
"Her: Welcome to McDonalds sir, may I take your order? Me: *hands her a shovel with mouth agape* ALL. THE. FRIES."
"Son of a Beach So I like digging. I am going to go the beach and become a professional digger. Professional digger."
"How do you disappoint a redditor?"
"I have the opposite of a photographic memory i have a potatographic memory."
"When I have children I'm gonna make them watch the movie ""2012"" and tell them I survived that. #awesome"
"I'm really worried Justin Timberlake is going to have me naked by the end of this song."
"Give me my Money!! How do you make a Hormone-- Don't pay her!"
"????LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR ????LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR ????LET THE BODIES HIT THE- ""Carl, you're fired. You're a horrible mortician."""