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Joke of the Day
"""F,DT I am."" - Yoda texting a girl that he's DTF"
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"According to the Bible, what's Noah's favorite fruit? Pears."
"I wish this cop would stop riding my ass, it makes me paranoid. I also wish he'd turn his sirens off and stop trying to shoot out my tires."
"Why is it that when Dick Cheney shot someone in the face, nothing happened, but when Clinton did it he was impeached?"
"[OC c/o my 9 y.o.] What holds up a bowl's pants? Suspoonders!"
"Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, 8, 9."
"I like jokes. Today Good joke is I am a Joke ."
"Is it blowjob, blow job, or blow-job? God, I hate writing thank you letters."
"Sesame Street never allowed Mrs. Piggy to count to 100. Everytime she made it to 69, she got a frog in her throat."
"Have you heard of the object without mass? It doesn't matter"