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Joke of the Day

"Lois Lane unexpectedly comes to visit Clark Kent but he can't find his glasses so he has to stick his face in a pie like Mrs. Doubtfire."

"I am not well... ... neither am I a river!"

"What is the difference between Harry potter and jews? Harry potter made it out if the chamber"

"India launched a rocket to Mars yesterday... That's a heck of a place to put a call center."

"What does a vegetarian zombie eat? GRAAAIIIIIINS"

"I keep waiting for a musical montage to start so I can do something awesome."

"Driving isn't even in the top 5 things I'm thinking about when I'm driving."

"What's the difference between Donald Trump and Joffrey Baratheon ? Trump is older."

"How often do I drink Blue Moon? Once in awhile."

"*Speed Dating* Him: Do you have any hobbies? Me: *tying my hair in a big knot under my chin so I look like I have a beard* ""TAAA-DAAA!"""