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Joke of the Day

"Want to know how to not get malware? To late, you already clicked the link."

"What happened when the girl dressed as a spoon left the Halloween party? No one moved. They couldn't stir without her."

"We should call people who vape... *vapires*"

"I heard the kid who fell into the gorilla pit was actually trying to get the jewelry his mother dropped. He didn't get the gold but he got the silver back."

"You never can trust atoms... Because they make up everything!"

"A three hour long movie adaptation of pages 74 and 75 of the Hobbit? Friggin count me in."

"A priest, a rabbi, and a monk walk into a bar. The bartender asks, ""Is this a joke?"""

"Q: You're sailing on a boat with a pack of cigarettes, but do not have a fire source, what do? A: Throw one overboard to make the boat a cigarette lighter."

"Why are round bales of hay illegal? Because cows can't get a square meal."

"Maglev train hits 310mph in Japan. Critics say it has barely left the ground."