144314

Joke of the Day

"What's brown and rhymes with Snoop Dr. Dre"

"How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? None! ... They just beat the room for being black."

"You can't run through a campground, you can only ran Because it's past tents"

"I called out of work today... Told my boss I had anal glaucoma. I couldn't see my ass coming in today."

"I lose a lot of arguments just so I can go back to my nap."

"We don't need a Voting Rights Act. If we just give all the votes to rich people, then democracy will just trickle down to everyone else."

"Dear bill collectors, if you want me to answer the phone, instead of ""no caller ID"" try something like ""free shoes"""

"My neighbor told me to close the curtains when I'm naked, but then I don't get that cool sensation of pressing up against the window glass"

"Mrs. Potato Head: OH MY GOD! Mr. Potato Head: What? Mrs. PH: Your browser history. Mr. PH: I can explain! Mrs. PH: TATER TOTS YOU PERVERT?!?"

"I ran three miles today. Finally I said, ""Lady take your purse."""