123137

Joke of the Day

"""Just dashing to the shops"" Woman [showers, washes hair, styles hair, puts on make up, chooses outfit, irons clothes] Man [grabs car keys]"

"Why did the music teacher get arrested So Doe Mi"

"I can sing a rainbow.. Grey and grey and grey and grey, Grey and grey and grey... I can sing a woodlouse... Kudos to Bill Bailey."

"What's the difference between a dead cat and a dead lawyer on the road? The dead cat has skid marks around it."

"What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend? Wiped his ass. (Haven't seen this on here, hope its not a repost.)"

"Stretching before working out is for wussies could someone please call 911?"

"What do you call a woman with a bicycle on her head ? Petal !"

"The Hunger Games is the thinking girls Twilight I don't dislike Hunger Games but everyone over 20 knows this is a joke."

"I feel bad for having sex with my best friend's sister. What's even worse is that my brother is my best friend."

"Even if oil prices go down, I'm still going to siphon gas from my neighbor's car because I like the adrenaline rush and he's an asshole."