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Joke of the Day
"I was sitting in traffic the other day... and I got run over."
Next Joke
"Why don't seagulls ever fly over the bay? Because then they'd be bagels."
"What's the most popular contraceptive in Israel? Iron condome"
"Jeopardy gum If Jeopardy! champion Arthur Chu started a candy company, the gum would have a locomotive on the wrapper, and would be called - get this - Chu Chew!"
"You had me at ""we've got the place surrounded"""
"Doctor: we saved your dad but he's part owl now Son: Dad it's me Dad: *head turned 180* who Son: very funny Doctor: yeah he has amnesia too"
"How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irish man? None!"
"Don't worry, you are safe Zombies eat brains"
"When I have complicated problems I always ask myself, what would my imaginary wife do? And then I end up buying myself cupcakes, and shoes."
"[goes to sign up for course on how to handle bad news better] ""sorry, we're full"" [lights myself on fire]"