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Joke of the Day

"Why don't Europeans have foot fetishes? they use the metric system"

"How can you help a starving cannibal? Give him a helping hand."

"My 4yo: Dad, you're old, right? Me: I'm not that old. 4: You're not new. Me: Go to bed."

"I went to the gym and did a negative pullup today. It was a letdown."

"What do you call a guy with a rubber toe? Roberto."

"If a tramp and a bunch of rich people are dressed the same, how does the tramp stand out? He begs to differ."

"My priest told me that my inner kid in me is still young... I don't think the inner kid in him is as young as the kid he was in."

"How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Three. A left ear, a right ear, and a final front ear."

"What do you call an economics lecturer? Prof. it"

"There are dogs that can detect cancer, find missing people, detect bombs, etc. My dog rolls around in other animals feces."