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Joke of the Day

"Why do french tanks have rear mirrors? So they can also see the front lines."

"Pimples on teenagers are asterisks on things they say* *Listener discretion is advised"

"Why can't you have military coup in Russia? Because in Russia the military coups you."

"cute girl just saw me try to walk and drink water at the same time so dating her is off the table now"

"What do you get if you cross Oddjob with Blofeld? Oddfeld..."

"After a night out with friends a man comes stumbling home late He's greeted by his wife looking stern with her arms crossed. She exclaims ""Drunk again!"" He replies ""Me too!"""

"You've reached voicemail of [Jim], leave a message. ""Hi it's the library. The book 'How to Steal Library Books' is now 1 week over...UH OH"""

"Why don't women propose to men? Because the guy'd always be disappointed when she took out a ring."

"WIFE: omg the FBI ME: thats just female body inspectors W: why are they here M: probably all those female bodies we buried W: o yah lol"

"Why was 6 happy to see 7? Because 7 ate 9."