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Joke of the Day

"85% of conversations with my mom is trying to figure out who the ""she"" in her story is."

"What do you call Magic Johnson in a wheel-chair? *Roll-AIDS*"

"'Expect the unexpected' Now that would make the unexpected the expected, but since the expected is being expected, then that would mean it wasn't the unexpected, so what the fuck do we expect?"

"A mathematician and a statistician wrote a cook book together. It was called ""Pi A LA Mode""."

"Feline-loving fashionista's favorite music? Techno. *boots-n-cats-n-boots-n-cats-n-boots-n-cats*"

"What's the diffrence between a black guy and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four."

"What the difference between woman and man? A man has always the same penis between his legs."

"[Thanksgiving] ME: hey dad will ya pass the peas DAD: say please ME: hey dad will ya pass the please DAD: *tears up so hard*"

"I used to drive a Toyota.... .... But then I got a job."

"Anyone hear the one.. Anyone hear the one about the messy bed? Yeah, I made it up."